I’ll have the combo with a call from the past to keep pushing forward……


I just said that out loud to myself and for real, I am incredibly thankful for another Friday in the Florida sun. (And my parents air conditioner) ha! It was a busy and a bit heavy (in a good way) week with appointments, an interview about my cancer journey and my stem-cell savior twin brother, (all the feels), partnered with a bone marrow biopsy and baby vaccines….and we made it and I could not be happier to be moving past this 6 month milestone. I think I am stronger because of it.

Someone asked me the other day how I was feeling…..and I had to finally be honest, I feel physically strong and like I am finally putting this behind me, day by day, but survivorship, although beautiful and the best life has to offer, is a bit “emotionally” bumpy at times. She responded, “So it’s a combo, and you know the combo is always better, because you get the best of both.” She said exactly what I needed to hear and I will be forever grateful and remember that “the combo,” is not just the preferred Portillos order (Only my Chicago followers will get this), but it’s the preferred prescription for moving forward. Cancer free life, I totally love you.

A call from the past came in today, starting with a 410-328, I knew my old Maryland Medicins were calling. It brought back some big emotions but I was quickly calmed by the sound of the Research Attendings voice. His drug, I am convinced was keeping me alive and in remission for the 9 months in 2017. Unfortunately it was not approved so I was pulled off the trial after one year, 3 months later my cancer was quickly making a comeback. The Research required biopsy saved my life by catching and confirming the creeping cancer in January…Thus leading to the more invasive and intricate journey to transplant, a tried and true way to tell cancer to go away for good with twin brother’s stem cells protecting me for the rest of my life. ❤️ The Doctor and I spoke about the journey, he asked about my parents, I told him about my PTSD and he congratulated me on the 6 month milestone. He then ended the conversation with words I will never forget: “Now you can go and live your life, this is in the past and we are very happy to see this happen for you.”

This call from the past was exactly what I needed to perservere through this weekend and for many weekends beyond. Although this journey at times has been darker than I ever imagined, the people I have met along the way have changed and brightened my life in ways I never thought possible and I will carry them with me in gratitude forever.

Here’s to keeping the past in the past, enjoying the present and moving forward into the future!



2 thoughts on “I’ll have the combo with a call from the past to keep pushing forward……

  1. Teri Cremer

    Love that you appreciate each breath, as you and others have taught me. Trying to be present and supportive of a few dear friends now going through the loss of loves and health that comes with the blessing of living this long.


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